The box of requirement is a little like Harry Potter's Room of Requirement. At a time when Harry needs it, the room provides everything he needs. 

The same can be true for us when we are in the midst of feeling big emotions, and it can feel scary that we are out of control. Whatever those feelings might be maybe, sad, angry, anxious, hurt, rejected and so many more, it can be hard for us to think rationally, so we might react in ways that are unhelpful to us or others. A box of requirement will help your child plan when they are calm what would be helpful at times when their emotions are starting to get bigger to help ease the emotions before they feel out of control.

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You will need:

• A cardboard or wooden box
• Items that help relax your child when their emotions are growing  

Instructions:

1. Encourage your child to think about what activities or items will help them feel less stressed and calm when their feelings are building.

2. Start to gather items up to put in the box.
   
   Here are some suggestions of what they might be, but remember what helps is unique to us: 

• Photos of people, places or things that are helpful, inspiring, calming or encouraging, or pictures of things that make you smile
• A playlist of music to help you sit in your emotion or to distract you from it so you want to dance around the kitchen
• Something to cuddle or something that belonged to the person that has died that you can snuggle
• Some written affirmations to say to yourself. For example, 'even though I have all this anxiety, I will be ok. I am kind. I am loved and lovable. I will get through this and be happy. I am a good person'
• A stress ball to squeeze or a gadget to fiddle with
• Something to taste like a strong mint or a chewing gum
• A little packet of tissues
• Something to smell like a lavender cushion, an essential oil, or spray of fragrance
• A journal and a pen, paper and pencils to colour or draw with, or a mindful colouring book
• A list of plans, hopes and dreams for the future, pictures of places you might want to visit or activities you might want to do
• A list of suggestions; take five deep breaths, look for four things you can see that make you smile, make a cup of tea; go for a run; punch or scream into a pillow; bounce on the trampoline; bake a cake, listen to five minutes of mindfulness on your phone, or perhaps – do the list again!

3. Once you have created box of requirement, put it away somewhere it is easy to get to, maybe under their bed, or in the wardrobe, so it’s not in their face all the time. Then, when your child feels their emotions rising, they can take out their box of requirement and in there will be the things that will help them, to relax, calm down and think for just a few minutes, so they don’t react and then regret it.

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Watch our short animated film which suggests ways children and young people can remember someone important to them who has died.